About Our Daughters, Part I

Recently,  I saw a possible "at risk" pre-teen girl. With some mildly disturbing behaviors, her parents would like me to weigh in on whether she has been sexually exposed or not. I am not a child abuse investigator, but there were some things that could contribute to her being more at risk than the average eleven year old girl. Due to some factors [confidentiality, you know], the bottom line is that she will be subject to a fair amount of self esteem eroding situations. If she stood out due to being too tall, or too short; too big or too scrawny, she will be subject to the endless belittling of her inappropriate classmates. If this is the case, low, low, low self esteem lends itself to the potential of victimization as well as future inappropriate behaviors. How, as loving parents can we combat the negativity facing our child? Overly simply put, we must counter-balance it with assisting our child in developing skills in order to give them a solid sense of pride and self achievement. Assuring our child that they are great, or smart, or pretty is not good enough. Teaching them "that sticks and stones..." is less than helpful. She plays the flute? Join her enthusiastically in her home practices. A beginner in softball? Play catch with her. Show her how to bat. Show her how to catch the ball; all are loving home activities, and all extra bonuses to help her achieve. Back in my girls softball coaching days, I sent home "newsletters" for the parents reminding them that in a matter of seconds, their girls will have moved away from home. Playing catch with our kids enables them to get a jump on the typical kid who doesn't practice at home. Plus, we teach them how to be kind, loving parents themselves.
Strengthen your kid and you will also strength their spirit.